EX CHRISTIANS FOR JESUS - Kingdom of Grace

EX CHRISTIANS FOR JESUS!

WHAT? What the heck are you talking about, you moron, if you are for Jesus, aren’t you a Christian?

Not really, at least not really by American “Christian” standards, besides, who is your Jesus? For those of us who did not grow up within the walls of “Our Beloved Synod,” (gak), we are quite often ex Christians for Jesus because we had no concept of who the real Jesus is. We who burned out on Christianity, burned out because we had the wrong one, we had a mean Jesus and not the real Jesus.

WOULD THE REAL JESUS PLEASE STAND UP?

Jesus is the one who washes you, but then tells you that through your good works and righteous living, you need to maintain your salvation.

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Jesus is the one who demands that you must (with every head bowed and every eye closed) raise your hand. And now that you were dumb enough get caught doing that, and the pastor saw you do it, now you have to stand up, walk down the aisle, and have to say this prayer (strange, I never saw this one in the Bible???). And now that you have done that, you have to go to the back room where our counselors will write down your credit card number (okay, not really, but, you really should tithe your 10% like a good Jew). Now that you have done that, you have to get plugged in to the church. AND IF YOU DON'T DO IT, YOU WILL BE LEFT BEHIND IN THE RAPTURE AND GET YOUR HEAD CHOPPED OFF!!!

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What ever happened to Jesus plus nothing equals salvation? If you have to do ANYTHING, then Jesus must need your help to save you. Like I always say, “either Jesus alone is your Savior, or He isn't.” Which is it going to be?

Jesus is the one who wants you to be happy, stupid and rich, just like me. You see, Jesus (even though He was never rich Himself and His kingdom is not of this world) wants you to be wealthy beyond your wildest dreams and live in a mansion and drive a sports car oh yeah and live without any pain or suffering, to His glory. Now all that you need to do, is send me all the money that you have. No need to worry about your bills and obligations, God will take care of that after you screw over your credit rating. After all, what Jesus is really about is your stupid fat lazy butt getting ahead without any effort or sacrifice on your part. You friggen Holy Roller welfare recipient.

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YOU MORON! Maybe if you would have read your Bible, you wouldn't be bankrupt now.

Jesus, oh, that guy, yeah he was a teacher, a good one who came to teach about love, peacefulness and justice (just like Gandhi). Funny how in Matthew 10, Jesus says that He did not come to bring peace, but a sword (don’t get me wrong, swords are cool, not as cool as guns, but that’s for another rant). Anyway, you are silly if you think that Jesus is God, of course he wasn’t, he was just a really good guy, like the Buddha and Mohammad.

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Jesus clearly claimed to be God and He really was not so nice, especially if you thought that you are a good person like the Pharisees. (Matthew 23:27, Matthew 3:7, 12:24, 23:33, Luke 3:7, Mark 7:6, Luke 12:56, 13:15... and many more)

Whatever you think about Jesus that is not directly from Scripture, it is probably wrong.

How do we know who the real Jesus is then? He is the one who is all and only about the forgiveness of your sins.

Plain and simple, thats what He came to do, thats what He did and thats what we have in Him. He came lowely, born in a stable (probably a cave where thy kept animals) and He was laid to rest in a manger, a regular old food trough. Pretty lowly indeed, but lowly, so that we know that no matter what sort of screw ups we are and no matter what our position in life, Jesus made Himself to be one of us.

He lived a perfectly righteous life without any sin whatsoever on our behalf because we are so unable to stop ourselves for sinning and we could not in the least be righteous on our own, so He did it for us. He came and exchanged His perfect righteousness for all of your wretchedness (2 Corinthians 5:21) apart from you doing anything in the least to earn it (Ephesians 2:8-9).

This is the real Jesus, the one who allowed Himself to beat nearly to death and allowed Himself to die the death of a criminal for the crimes against God that you and I committed, those crimes that He was completely innocent of.

This is the real Jesus, the one who dies your death and takes your punishment that you have coming and in the midst of this injustice, He cries out to His Father in heaven saying “forgive them for they don't know what they are doing.” This is the real Jesus who inhales the sins of the world into Himself and exhales His life onto the world. This is the real Jesus, as we see God in the flesh, naked, beaten and pierced through the side, hanging dead on a criminal's execution device, a cross.

WOULD THE REAL JESUS PLEASE STAND UP?

Three days later, He did exactly that as the grave could not hold the God of life. And in His bodily resurrection, He promised us that we who have faith in Him will also be raised from the dead.

We ex Christians for Jesus have given up on looking to our good works for salvation (thats actually Jewish and not Christian anyway), we ex Christians for Jesus look to Jesus who is the author and finisher of our faith (Hebrews 12:2).

We ex Christians for Jesus know that we do not have to be good little boys and girls in order to be saved. We know that it is not at all about us, but only about Jesus. The funny thing is that when you develop the proper theology of an ex Christian for Jesus, you more and more, over time, grow to hate your sin. The other thing that is sort of funny is that you have less and less of a problem admitting what a wretched person you are and you are then free to bask in the glory of the real Jesus who would have you do none other (Luke 10:40ish).

The belief in the real Jesus would have us do nothing but proclaim Christ Crucified for the remission of sins, like that crazy old St. Paul said in 2 Corinthians 2 that we should.
Ex Christians for Jesus are actually just tired of people saying that we need to move beyond the cross and resurrection to deeper things like Christian Finances, Christian Dating, Christian Parenting, Christian Taxidermy, Christian Motorcycle Repair and the like. We know that the true faith clings only to its object, and the object of a believer in Christ is none other than Christ Himself.

WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT?

Are you looking at yourself and what a good person you are? You're not a good person you know (Romans 3:9-18). You and I are filthy, empty handed beggars in the presence of the one true God who alone is good and righteous. WE SUCK!

If you are looking at yourself and your good works at all, you will come up empty, or you will try to justify your own sins as “not so bad.” OOOH I hate the “their not so bad sins.” Those are the ones that get up in a heap O doo doo. The ones that we justify away are the ones that we hold outside of the real Jesus' forgiveness. Those are the really dangerous ones.

Stop being so freaken self righteous and confess with us that you are a dirt bag before God, but confess even more that Jesus has taken you out of your filth, washed you in baptism (Titus 3:5) and coated us with His own clean righteousness (Gal 3:26-27).

Thats about all I have to say about that.
The Ranting Reverend

THAT MAKES ME MAD

THAT MAKES ME MAD!
By The Ranting Citizen

A couple of years back, a little boy was in the school cafeteria. The school had one of those “zero tolerance policies” on pretty much everything. The little boy, picked up his lunch item, a chicken finger, pointed it at a teacher and said “bang bang.” For this crime against humanity, he was promptly expelled (or suspended, I don’t remember).

Who in their right minds gave this child a loaded chicken finger?

Look, if you give children loaded food, someone is bound to get shot. DUH!
Zero tolerance, what a crock! When I was a kid, in some schools there were shooting teams where you could bring your .22 rifle to school, because you had practice after school and it was perfectly alright to bring your aspirin to school, or your penicillin or whatever the Dr. put you on. These “educators” who will keep your children from taking their meds without the nurse handing it to them are the same ones that want to dope every energetic little boy because it is easier to dope them than teach them.

Why aren’t girls doped as much as boys? For one, the part of the brain that deals with paying attention in girls develops younger than boys, but second, and foremost, I fear that feminism leads in this. Little boys are evil because they have a penis and thus we must find some way of castrating them if not in reality, at least emotionally so that they cannot grow to oppress little girls, because after all, men are brutal, vicious beasts who MUST DIE!!!
I will stop now before I really get mad and just spew cuss words.

MYSOPHOBIA

The Fear of the Common Cup
(actually Mysophobia is the fear of germs, but read this anyway)

I think today, I will talk about the Lord’s Supper and in particular the cup of blessing in Christ’s blood.

I have noticed that better than two thirds of the congregation takes communion from the individual cups instead of the common cup or the chalice. I will not say that it is not the Lord’s Supper with the individual cups at all, but I will say that they were introduced by the Methodists and got traction in the Lutheran Church after a fear of germs arose and that fear partly came through the admission of grape juice in some churches instead of wine which has incredible purification properties.

Is it safe to drink from the common cup? Yes it is very safe. Wine kills germs and the inert metals of the cup are not a breeding ground for the little buggers.

First on wine: Military physicians of the last century noted that troops that drank wine were much less susceptible to diseases like cholera. Wine is a very good antiseptic even when the alcohol has been removed. That’s strange because we usually think that the alcohol is what kills the germs. Well, the alcohol does, but wine is double blessed as it has other germ killing agents called polyphenol which occurs naturally when the wine ferments. Grapes and grape juice do not have them as they are unfermented. During the fermentation process, these polyphenols split off of the complex sugars and become active. These properties were discovered in our modern era by Dr. Lister who pioneered antiseptic surgery.

Polyphenols are found in many disinfecting cleaners in hospitals and are very effective in killing germs. Polyphenols are also found in the wine in our communion cup.

The CDC (Center for Disease Control) has never reported an instance of anyone receiving a disease from the communion chalice in all of its years of reporting, could it be by God’s design?

All of the scientific data says that the chalice is safe, and I as the head theologian of this congregation am content to confess that I do not believe that the Lord would make anyone who is receiving the body and blood of Christ in faith ill.

I am so confident of this, that I now commune myself last to put my money where my mouth is.

On the night that our Lord was betrayed, He gathered with His 12 in the upper room. They all had their own cups, but He passed His cup of blessing and they all drank from the one cup. A common cup is the way that the Lord instituted communion and it is a wonderful sign that we are all one in Christ.

If you have wanted to drink from the chalice, but were afraid of germs, I hope that you will no longer be. If you want to keep using the individual cups, I am sure the Lord will bless you there as well.

Have comfort and know that in all things, the Lord has worked your salvation for you.

Something to Remember

Four Basic Handgun Safety Rules

1. Treat ALL firearms as if they were loaded.

2. DO NOT point at or cover anything with the muzzle until ready to shoot.

3. Keep trigger finger off the trigger and outside the trigger guard until ready to shoot.

4. Be certain of your target and your line of fire.

Is Socialsm Anti Christian? - Semi Political Ranting

Is Socialism Anti Christian?
By The Ranting Citizen

so·cial·ism Pronunciation: 'sO-sha-"li-z&m
Function: noun
Date: 1837
1 : any of various economic and political theories advocating collective or governmental ownership and administration of the means of production and distribution of goods
2 a : a system of society or group living in which there is no private property b : a system or condition of society in which the means of production are owned and controlled by the state
3 : a stage of society in Marxist theory transitional between capitalism and communism and distinguished by unequal distribution of goods and pay according to work done.

In short socialism is a matter of a Robin Hood mentality of taking from the rich and giving to the poor, or in other words “redistribution of wealth.”

Is America a socialist country? Yes and no. Our tax system has turned more and more socialist, taking from the haves and giving to the have-nots. The first income tax in the United States was levied following the Civil War so that the Union government could pay its bills. But in 1895 a later income tax was declared unconstitutional by the Supreme Court. The Sixteenth Amendment to the Constitution, authorizing the tax, was ratified February 25, 1913.

The income Tax was initially to pay for war, and slowly that money began to be redistributed by the government and also to support the bureaucracy required to redistribute that wealth.

Initially, the tax confiscated a small amount of money and was geared toward the rich. The wealthy alone could not bear the burden and so it was directed at the middle class and now we all share in this redistribution of wealth. The haves pay more than the have nots, but through other taxes like sales tax, phone taxes, gas taxes so forth and so on we all pay taxes that get mixed around the machine and spit out again, smaller than when they went in. We all know the stories about how if you put a frog in cool water and then slowly turn up the heat, you can boil them before they will jump out, so it is with taxation.

Tax Freedom day is that day when we stop working for the government and actually get to keep our earnings. You can see here how the boiler has slowly been turned up on the American working frogs.

Tax Freedom Day:

In 1902 was January 31

In 1922 was February 17

In 1948 was March 28

In 1958 was April 10

In 1968 was April 24

In 1978 was April 30

In 1988 was May 2

In 1998 was May 10

If you didn’t catch that, the average American worker is a slave of the government and their forced taxation machine for the first 5 months and 10 days of the year, then you get to keep the rest of your money.

What happens to all that money?

Well, it all goes into a big government machine that spins it around and then kicks it back out again in all sorts of directions.

First of all, those who “administer” the various programs have to get paid, in the welfare department that takes up about 70%-75% of that money, then the left over 25-30% of that money gets redistributed to the poor. As a result, the poor get just enough to be utterly dependent on this money, but they do not get enough to have hope to rise above their poverty. So the politicians promise more money to the poor who are addicted to the government dole, they vote for those who promise more and get just a little more and the rest of us have our tax freedom day moved back another week or two to pay for it.

The name of the game is taking from the haves and giving to the have nots. The poor hate the rich and upper middle class and even the middle class because they have more than they do. Then politicians pandering to the poor voters tell them that it is not fair that the rich should have such an unfair advantage.

It seems to me that the Bible speaks about such attitudes, yes that’s right, Exodus 20:17 “Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's house, thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor any thing that is thy neighbor's.” I think all of that would also include thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s income.

The redistribution of wealth is in fact completely dedicated to promulgating covetousness among the American people with slogans like “the rich get richer and the poor get poorer.” This sort of talk only inflames envy and feelings that the wealthy have an unfair advantage.

Who are the wealthy anyway? According to the latest standards, if a family makes approximately $90k a year, they are in the top tax bracket and thus considered wealthy. That means that a family where both the husband and wife are tenured high school teachers and earn the national average for high school teachers, they are rich and have an unfair advantage over the “poor.”

I would be willing to bet that if you talked to those two teachers, they sure would not feel like they were on a par with the CEO of a major corporation or a litigation lawyer (more about lawyers and their sins another time).

So who is it that most of us think of as being rich? This question depends on your position in life. Those who make $20k a year think that if they could just make $40k, they might be set and for sure if they made $100k, but the fact is, they would still spend more than they make if they did not learn to manage their money. Those who make $100k tend to think that if they could just make $200k they might be set, those who make $200k want more and so forth and so on until you get to Bill Gates worth more than $30 BILLION and still building his empire in the quest for more and more.

Are the rich greedy with their “more is never enough mentality?” No more greedy than the poor with their “more is never enough mentality.” The difference is that hopefully the rich have worked themselves silly to get to where they are and if they have gotten there through deceit, then of course, they should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.

How should we react to those who have more than we do? First of all, we should never covet what they have. Coveting is basically saying, “those people do not deserve that, I do.” Or, “its not right that they have that which I don’t!”

But the rich often get that way through self-denial, postponing gratification. That is a wise thing, so why despise those who have struggled to gain when so many have not?

Those who despise those who have achieved things often blame everyone but themselves for their situation. There are those who have made poor decisions in their lives. Those who get pregnant outside of marriage are often trapped in a scenario of raising children without the aid of a second or even primary income which is satisfactory for raising children. Those who refuse to go to college because they do not think that it is “their thing.” Those who never put in the extra time and effort at work to rise through the ranks. Those who get stuck in their current position and never try to rise above it for fear of risk.

All these tend to be the covetous people who the liberal politician appeal to with promises of more Government assistance.

Is socialism Anti Christian ? I believe that since it is built on class envy and covetousness, it is safe and right to say, yes, it leads others into sin.

Alligator Lessons - Kingdom of Grace

Alligator Lessons
By The Ranting Reverend

Matthew 5:11 "Blessed are you when they revile and persecute you, and say all kinds of evil against you falsely for My sake.

Pastors lovingly, or not so lovingly often refer to their problem parishioners as “alligators.”

Alligators are usually marked by their lack of kindness to their pastors which manifests itself in rude and terse behavior. This behavior is most often born out of one of two things, either the view that a pastor is an employee, (which is a miserable understanding of what a pastor is and the doctrine of the Divine Call to the office of ministry), or the fact that a pastor has had to make a stand for truth in the face of felt needs.

Some alligators will be public and mount a full frontal attack on their pastors and some work behind the scenes and attack through the gossip mill sowing seeds of destruction and poisoning the well, as it were.

Alligators cause pastors great consternation and grief and sometimes the alligators are victorious over the pastor and either beat him to death or they drive him out.

But wait, didn’t God create alligators for a reason? After all, all of God’s creation serves some purpose and we know that what man means for evil, God will work for good.

Alligators serve several good purposes for pastors because alligators are good teachers.

First, let us agree together that pastor’s are called by God to serve His church. The pastor is the under-shepherd in Christ. He is called to serve God’s people with God’s Word and Sacraments. The pastor is to be the voice and hands of Jesus to God’s people, he is the steward of the mysteries of God, and sometimes, he must also serve as a theological bouncer when people are causing division in the body.

Alligators nip and plot and scheme to overthrow and devour the pastors by either treating pastors like mere employees or they decry them as unloving because a pastor said “NO” to something their sinful desires cry crocodile tears for.

This is where the pastor can become a student of the alligators for in the same way these alligators treat their pastor, we find it is the same way that all of God’s people treat Jesus.

The alligator who treats the pastor like an employee who should be here to work for them and be accountable to them and act as though the pastor is here only for them and their individual wants shows the pastor (and all Christians) exactly what our behavior is like toward Jesus.

We all carry on something fierce when things do not go our way and we often act as though the Lord has something to answer for. We try to call God on the carpet for not doing our bidding. We behave as though Jesus should be here to make us happy and cater to our wants and desires (which are usually sinful and or foolish).

What have the alligators taught us here? We are as snobby to God (which we have no reason or right to be), even as parishioners are toward their pastors whom God has given them.

The other sort of alligator treats the pastor with utter contempt because the pastor has had to make a stand which is not popular with the parishioner. This is a situation which revolves around ignorance of God’s word, ignorance of doctrine, ignorance of circumstances and plain old pride.

How do we treat God in this way? We in our pride and arrogance become angry and carry on something fierce when we ask God for something and He says, “NO.”

When God decides that our wants might harm us or others and that they are not in our best interest or sinful, we carry on against God and act as though He no longer loves us or cares about us, but could it be that He is trying to protect us from harming ourselves?

We, like this alligator leer at God and remain distant and think God to be so unfair.

How fair is it that Jesus, who is God, came to this earth and lived as a man? How fair is it that He was born in a barn and laid to sleep in a trough as an infant? How fair is it that He was attacked constantly through His public ministry? How fair is it that He died to atone for the sins of wretched sinful people like you and me?

Who are we to complain against God? Who are we to call our creator on the carpet for the way He treats us, when all that He wants for us is our salvation? All God wants from us is our company at the Feast which has no end and we treat Him with distain and wretchedness with our sin that we hold in His face.

What have the alligators taught me? They have taught me that all of the hate they have for me is nothing compared to the way I am before God.

Chief of Sinners - Kingdom of Grace

Chief Of Sinners Though I Be.

I count it as an incredible thing that the Lord should take someone like me and make me a pastor. How in the world did I get here and what is the Lord thinking?

I sometimes think about the Lord’s marvelous sense of humor as I consider that a little kid that grew up ditching church and school and dropping out of high school to be a rock star should grow up to receive two degrees and be a pastor. How in the world did this happen?

It is always encouraging to me to read about the Apostles in the Bible and what a diverse crowd they were. Fishermen, a tax collector, a zealot, not exactly all the most likely candidates to be the first pastors, at least not likely if we were to chose them.

We like to think of pastors as holy men and righteous individuals, but the Lord is the one that calls that which is not Holy to be Holy in Him.

You see, I, as a pastor am a sinner just like you are. I am just a fallen man given a position to proclaim the mercy and forgiveness of Christ, that’s my whole reason for being here. I am simply to be the hands and mouth of Jesus, and I must say that is a scary thing, for my hands are unclean and my lips are full of sin.

Just as Jesus has called me to be the spiritual head of a congregation, He has called you to be the spiritual heads of your homes. Fathers, lead your children in matters of the Lord. model prayer and devotion to them, teach them the catechism and minister to your wives with love and patience. Wives, honor your husbands and gladly teach your children at home.

Oh sure, I know you fight and quarrel among yourselves in the home, it is the result of sin and we all do it from time to time. Oh sure, I know marriage is hard and raising your children is not easy, but I encourage you my fellow sinners, to confess to one another and speak the words of mercy to one another and together, under Christ, we will somehow muddle through life together.

I am still not sure why the Lord would call me to be a pastor, but I am sure glad that He has, because I can think of nothing else that I would rather be. What a great thing I get to do, tell others about what a wonderful God we have. How loving and merciful our Savior, Jesus is to lay down His life for me and then call me to tell others about it.

Why me? Perhaps to show you that the Lord is able to do anything He pleases, and to show that He is the Divine Fox who loves a good pun. You see, as the chief of sinners, that simply means that I lead other sinners and to where am I leading you? I pray that I will lead you to the foot of the cross of Christ, where we can lay down our burdens, once and for all.

In Jesus’ Name
The Ranting Reverend